We’re our kids’ most ardent cheerleaders. But when we’re so emotionally involved in our kids’ success, some of us can inadvertently grow overbearing.

Imagine a parent constantly shouting out, “You’re a star, beat those guys!” Or, “Show ‘em what you’re made of!”

Too much public commentary can be embarrassing for kids. And we should always consider whether certain phrases may be disrespectful to other players. In kids’ sports, the focus shouldn’t be creaming the opposing team. It should be playing a decent, fair game.

Also, this is not professional territory. The coaches and referees are probably volunteers. It can be easy to disagree with a referee’s or a coach’s decision, but showing respect to everyone involved—regardless of a terrible play or bad call—helps keep the atmosphere at a kid-friendly level.

Don’t forget; your kids are constantly learning from your example. If you’re a hot-headed John McEnroe, they may follow your lead and believe that arguing—rather than determinedly moving past a disappointing result—is a more effective strategy.

And if you have concerns or ideas you’d like to run by the coach, you can always schedule a private meeting. A one-on-one discussion can produce far more productivity than anything shouted haphazardly in the middle of a game.